Pictured: about 60lbs of black walnut fruit. Yes, it's that dread time of year...the wind blows...the branches shake...suddenly there's a bump...bump bump...BANG! on the tender roof of your car! What are these divots? What are these round, green things lying everywhere? What are these...these dark stains on the concrete...? You look up. Towering above you is a gigantic, multi-armed, inhuman being, breathing through strange fronds, and in its tentacles you see its eggs, hundreds of them! Thousands of them! Raining down upon your property! You rush to get a rake, a shovel, an axe for God's sake...but it's too late! The lurid green orbs are piling up on the porch! Slamming against the screen door! They break through the glass, bounding like murderous tennis balls, and all you can do is let out one final, despairing SHRIEK...! Yeah they're black walnuts. Everyone I know who owns or rents hates black walnut trees, at least with the kind of bemusement that comes with t...
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